| 04.18.11 [drunk thought] note to self// mashup is the key, mashup will save the world. keep a look out for things that *go together*. then put them together. you might be the first to do it, and that makes it important. but make sure you do it with careful thought. dont mash willy nilly. mash with purpose. |
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| 06.28.09 What is pure existence? I imagine it is existence without question as to why. |
09.13.09 When i was first there I was a pig in mud, I didnt really have a clear vision of what i wanted to do , other than to get better at editing and learn the tricks of the post production trade. which I did: I got to be a much faster editor, learned Motion, some other programs. but as time went on, basically throughout the year of 2007, which coincidentally was the year the US formally admitted that the Earth's Temperature was rising yearly, and being part of a company founded by the man who broke global warming into the public sphere for my generation, I became very environmentally concerned. and, simultaneously aware of how Current was not the Green mecca, not the ground zero of green media that I wanted it to be. I realized basically that ENVIRONMENTAL MEDIA is what i wanted to be doing. Environment being what i'm concerned about, media being what i'm good at. I realized it would be the only thing that would make me feel legitimate as a person and a contributor as an artist. |
| 09.12.09 reaffirmations of Now don't help me plan for the future. |
| 12.07.09 Wisdom suggests I keep away from people on days like these. |
| 01.03.12 Thanks, everyone, for watching. I've enjoyed this comment thread immensely. Solid entertainment. My intention in making the video was not to speak to denialists. Denialists don't interest me. I happen to trust, however contrary to the bulk of you here, that the average person has more intellect than a bar of clay, and will take the appropriate message from it; and this, not because i made a successful advocacy film, but because I successfully didn't obscure the brilliance of Stephen Schneider's oratory. [I suppose you can and will debate this, too]. I never met the man, but upon seeing his speech I was moved to work with it. More people need to hear this, I thought. |
| 03.29.13 I love when a new piece of music feels magical. it's like it turns on a light inside you and fills a space you didnt know you occupied. new music can feel magical. weed helps. |
| 01.29.13 My politics are social. My religion is compassion. |
| 10.16.12 4 years later, I still love hearing him speak (when he has the fire) |
| 05.28.13 I'm an NPR snob. What does this mean? Kinda like a beer snob: You dont love all beers, the snob in you is selective of which beers shall henceforth grace your tastebuds. In a similar fashion, I will no longer listen to Neil Conan or Dave Iverson (KQED), and Terri Grosse is starting to lose its appealtoo. |
| 01.02.13 is math like playing pool, that at first you have to be very calculative, but later you can sort of take lump guesses at it and get it right because you've done this kind of stuff enough? like, you can see the angle, you can see around the bend. |
| 04.28.13 school was not a place i went to learn, but to test what i already knew. |
| 04.30.13 i think there's something serious PCs have incubated in people, and that is the LOOP effect. repeating behaviors ON LOOP for a period of time. eating directly off a sense of brain reward. I re-read my liked posts on facebook and why? to keep feeling good. when do i pull myself away? when i realized the mania of my behavior, or when the reward subsides. |
| 10.23.12 only on photoshop: 'painting the color of desaturation' in "selective color": turning up the charge of a color in order to extract it |
| 01.25.13 is it possible to get ahead of time, and would that happen by way of being super up and always looking at it and decontructing it to minutes and seconds, or the exact opposite? |
11.27.12 I'm looking to move again. |
06.03.13 When I think back, all I remember is having made a fool of myself. It's not enough at just live and die. |
05.31.13 I dont need a long term goal, just a regimen I can have faith in. |
05.25.13 a personal observation. I'm getting better at abdominal exercise. at first it wasnt easy... i felt like i had no control, like trying to telekinetically move a tub of jello... how on earth? but now brain and abdomen are more connected. This might ultimately make me a better potential dancer, but we may never know. |
05.10.13 Life is not boring. Even if it is routine: tomorrow, things will happen you can't even imagine right now. They may not change your life, but they will not have been expected. Simple pleasures, simple surprises. That's what i live for, at the moment. |
11.27.12 I'm looking to move again. |
12.26.12 to see at the innocent playful faces of the victims of the Newtown shooting, the joyful faces of the adults who loved what they did, serving our younger generation and partaking in their excitement for life, is heartbreaking. even for this old cynic. |
08.20.12 |
04.13.13 |
01.04.13 When some people cant handle the truth, they make it fiction. it's insane. #conspiracytheorists #hoaxists |
04.22.13 i consider it a personal achievement that I let the spider hanging down in front of my face to go about his merry way this morning. maybe we can coexist. although, if there were10 spiders in stead of 1, that would freak me out, and I would probably kill all of them. fuckin spiders. |
12.27.12 note to self: practice recognizing the infinity of a moment. and then let me know how you did it. |
12.22.12 |
11.03.12 You want to know the nutrition facts, the serving size, the net weight, the expiration date... But you don't want to know if it's GMO? |
01.28.13 Is having a cartridge that empties 100 bullets in 10 seconds necessary to honor the 2nd amendment? #disambiguation |
01.04.13 |
12.13.12 baby, i like it when you see what i mean. |
08.22.12 Fred Armisen's face makes me smile. so freaky. |
05.07.12 an an atheist, i have faith AND confirmation. #faith and confirmation |
10.23.12 moral boundaries are drawn by our demons |
01.26.13
social networking seems topical. even if you make a new friend or befriend an old friend, you rarely look past a few pages of their history. it's all about sharing present existence going forward. facebook does that well. still, narrative and purpose seems lost, and it's still what people want the most. this is why i didnt know what i wanted to do with the single-stream Tumblr, and why facebook's arbitrary dual-column post-Timeline setup seems ridiculous. Where is the narrative in that? why are we visually scanning the page from left to right and then back to left? Why, in order to make meaning of the things i read, in order to categorize them and compartmentalize them as holons in the greater narrative of connectivity, must i scroll back pages just to find them again.... imagine a network based on the evolutionary principle - evolution is after all the greatest narrative we know with a single source - to help people phylogenize and better understand the connectivity of the issues they care about. There should be a device for prioritization of an article within its thematic holon. There should be a device for connecting holons. There needn't necessarily be a "single point source" algorithms could point out similarities between holons in their structure. it's to help people begin to collect, compartmentalize, designate, and draw connections, the goal should be to help people become more aware of the entirety of an issue, and to be better equipped to respond to it. start with: user is given 10 blank boxes, asked what they care about. the program begins to make connective narrative between the two. perhaps the program could have a quesstionairre that asks certain questions to better relate "family" to "gun control" , away from "candy" but what if "candy" and "family" were important connectors for a user? how would the program figure that out with the same algorithm? We want our past MORE connected to our present, which would give us a greater sense of purpose for the future. |
01.16.13 adulthood, when you're not afraid to pray out loud. |
04.13.13 |
04.14.13 |
a potential syntax for a single narrative sequence *A B- C... ^D E. (F) |
08.27.12 the only difference between these [aforementioned] surgeries and abortion is that in this case the woman is extricating a part of her body that could potentially grow into another fully functioning human being - potentially! there are miscarriages (find statistic) and malformities and a hundred different things that could result in this human's either being incomplete or unviable. also, birth is not without its physical dangers for some women, so choosing 9 months prior to the gestation to terminate an otherwise dangerous physical condition in the future is, i would think, wise. and yes, we all understand and agree that the earlier you get to it, the better. |
12.01.12 Life is Procrastination. |
12.27.12 to not be conscious of your imposition on others is a condition to be overcome. #turndownyourshittyassmusic |
10.31.12 Obama's plea for bipartisanship lo these 4 years finally makes perfect, practical, demonstrable sense. |
10.17.12 |
10.30.12 Lately i'm always playing devil's advocate; not to be a prick, just to make sure there are no blindspots in a soundly comprehensive perspective. |
11.02.12 I'm a cheerleader who sometimes plays football. (on being the messenger more than the message, half the timeon forwarding others' art work and sharing it, rather than just posting and sharing my own.) |
10.13.12 What's one thing you do that you are pretty sure no one else on Earth does? For example, my file naming convention for downsized copies of photos is _120. Not sure why that number specifically, but i've been using it for years, and will use it til I die. |
10.11.12 this trip back home, it's been like swallowing sea water and happily drowning. I had forgotten my roots, but i've been reminded. |
10.13.12 Is there a word for when, due to perspiration or prolonged contact after having been bent or folded together, one's legs unstick from each other and separating them feels like peeling masking tape? I think that thing happened to my lungs, after sitting immobile for 6 hours in an airplane. |
10.03.12 as hunger grows, you realize more and more how food rules life. case in point: i would KILL YOU for a sandwich right now MOTHERFUCKER |
10.01.12 nothing is worse than the feeling of having squandered great opportunity. |
10.03.12 I hope I can be my own teacher if, in any given situation, there lacks the guidance. |
09.12.12 I do not like songs that have frivolous or lighthearted lyrics, usually because the music accompanying them is more deserving. |
08.27.12 oh, it's summer time, isn't it. My seasonal coil has come undone. |
09.16.12 I think it's good to form long term ideas, not make long term plans; and to ultimately remind yourself upon waking up - or perhaps after your coffee - that you may not live to see the end of the day, if you're not careful. |
09.20.12 Lying gives some people a sense of empowerment. Other people use silence. For yet a third type of people, truth is the tool. |
09.27.12 Also, I like what President Morsi of Egypt said about free speech at the UN General Assembly, but ultimately I agree with Obama:: cat's already out of the bag with free speech. democracy is the unregulated marketplace of ideas. |
09.16.12 |
09.27.12 so much to say, and so ineloquent. |
08.18.12 everyone has a personal threshold of "it doesnt need to be THAT loud." i dont need a loud life. just a proper life. i dont need many things. just the right things. |
08.18.12 you are a compound. that is your greatest asset. |
08.13.12 to teach, to pass on, to share through time... time is our arrow. |
08.08.12 it's funny we ever thought we were different than the animals to begin with. |
08.08.12 I love life. that is to say: I love everything i can share with you until the day comes that i can no longer share with you. life is not my experience - it is my shared experience. If you can share with me, I can love you. |
05.15.12 (an appreciation) I like you all for who you are. You do Yourselves very well. |
05.06.13 The feeling I get from learning about the roughly 10 lbs of microbial weight we carry around on and in our bodies that does not have our DNA is akin to seeing the 'Matrix filter' over the world and over myself, but not being able to read it. Apart from feeling simultaneously gutted of and reassured of my individual importance, it paints in my mind a swirly multicolored veneer upon the geometry of life, like oil forming an amoebic rainbow over the surface of a puddle, like a rubik's cube made of jackson pollocks; my mastery of it just as unlikely, only now there is more color and detail to get lost in. http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/loom/2010/10/03/time-for-a-da-vinci-upgrade-the-microbiome-image-of-the-day/#.UYgWL4VAHY0 |
05.04.13 |
04.29.13 yesterday i told a friend that one way to look at the day is that 'something is going to happen, and you have no idea what it is right now, but something unexpected is going to happen', and that's a way to think about life that can keep you energized and upbeat. mine was the beuatiful italian girl with curly hair and classes and a thin body, white button down tucked into jeans, we stopped in the same space, I with my cart, and i waved her through. She seemed nice and polite, cute as hell, and i'd have loved her long time. |
04.29.13 if we are unable to create new neurons, we are dead. true or false? |
04.24.13 I recently realized i have no long term goals - no long term personal goals, no long term artistic goals. i'm not sure how it got like this, but that's how it is now. Some people want a family. Some people want to be married. Some people want to make a documentary. Some want to find a cure for something. Some want to travel the world. Some people just want happiness, and i wonder if they really know how to go about getting it. I certainly do not. I just know what maintains me. Sometimes in the process of maintainence I feel happy. Sometimes i have ideas for a feature length film. Sometimes I am hopeful that she is the one. Sometimes I wonder if I will ever have children. Life's looking glass somewhere along the line changed in nature. I was no longer working towards a dream, but living a more immediate present and taking steps without seeing a destination. |
04.20.13 I want to stimulate your economy. |
04.03.13 media is a "piecing back together of the real" |
03.13.13 an institution that covers up pedophilia, condemns socially progressive lifestyles, and discourages birth control is as far as i'm concerned less relevant than the dinosaurs. The horror and nausea i feel at seeing thousands of people in a plaza going crazy for some old white guy they've never heard of before is more repellant than the simple indifference i have about the NFL and then, to hear NPR's Neil Conan get all breathy and newsy about it.... this is why i don't donate to public radio. |
02.07.13 ...when culture forgives innovation... ? |
02.03.13 Neil DeGrasse Tyson is an attractive man, he should shave that bigote |
01.08.13
i think a true and encompassing intelligence is likely the measure of balance one has between emotionality and raationality. intelligence is judged by the ability to make good decisions. empathy does not require statistics. |
01.03.12 i became more interesting when i started smoking weed. this is a completely non-egoic statement. weed is the x factor, the change agent, not the person, nor the brain of the person. not to say the brain is not good and capable of computation; efficent, productive, even creative - able to traverse and fortify its own paths in time and space. But it is weed that has been an agent of alteration that allows fluidity. creativity is a boat and you cant sail a boat if you dont have water. creativity is a boat on the river of fluidity. |
01.03.12 you dont just have to dot the is and cross the t's. you have to do it the right way. |
12.25.12 Exact Love might be an appropriate title for a dating site. a matchmaking site should by definition, by philosophy, be an exacting service, because people like the fun of it but sooner or later, or perhaps sooner? their intention was/is to find perfect problem with OKC: you cant type in how tall you want your partner to be in your profile, yet you can search for people of a certain height range. that's a social discretion, but it may cause unwanted emails. |
022513 Why everytime i come home from the dentist do my teeth feel like they want to fall out? |
021913 |
072012 I'm not entirely convinced the time I spend on the internet is healthy, case in point: my patterns are cyclical and increasing in interval. I loop through the outlets of communication while waiting for render. perhaps i would do better to sit and think about stuff, in that open space of thought, rather than fill each wait to be creative with the loop stuff. |
071412 the science devotee in me (but i'm just an artist) thinks that by quantifying and equating everything, the right answers to the toughest questions could be found. there are of course some presupposed values, like life, liberty, human rights. how much breathable air does a fighter jet's engines destroy in one run? that might tell us whether or not we really want to have Fleet Week. |
032412 i had been looking for a way to slow down time. then for a way to speed up my mind. unsuccessful, i must economize. |
072912 |
072912 more attention to detail. you cant make a bridge til you see the other side. |
080212 all you need is a curfew and a rally speech. it'll be ok. |
11.25.11 San Francisco is beautiful, but I miss the changing seasons. Some day I will move back to New England. |
07.20.12 My dreams basically amount to running away from people who want to kill me while trying to fuck women and/or find an appropriate place to pee. Every once in a while, an apocalypse. |
07.01.12 I often forget that I'm meant to play. When I get depressed, stressed, feeling worthless, unproductive, confused and chaotic, hopeless and nihilistic, I just need to step back and remember that I've built a jungle gym for myself. Play in it! |
02.11.12 my toke is as light yet clearly defined as the silver lining of a cloud. |
02.11.12 not everyone likes me, but i've at least stopped TRYING to be a dick. are you afraid that if you stop trying to be a dick, people still won't like you? |
02.11.12 my fear is not of the unknown: it is that history will repeat itself. |
03.26.12 *to be the real you* I remember a time when that was difficult. I was an adolescent. Everything that came out of my mouth had already come out of someone else's mouth on TV or the movies, and eventually I became aware of the fact that I was a walking concoction of regurgitated media. In a sense, i still feel like that today, though less so. The matter is how much we diversify our lives in order to discover what we really like and care to reflect. To attract with gravity. to find our moons. to become the center, not the orbit. there is the matter of creativity too. Supposedly, we add something unique to the recipe. |
01.09.12 |
11.29.11 "just want to watch the pandas for the rest of the show" (jon stewart, but applies as an existential statement) |
12.20.11 i can roll with most things, but you did something disrespectful to my guest, for which you ought to have apologized immediately, and instead when i brought it to your attention (not yelling at first, i'll remind you) you once again negated any wrongdoing, even claiming such silly things as: 1. maybe I smoked the cigarette. |
10.22.11 I find flying annoying, because i'm compelled every time to consider that it might be my last day alive. |
09.25.11 I'm not poor, it's just --- uggh, shopping. dont make me move. |
11.21.11 unified intelligence needs not empirical mastery. original idea about animals being better than us for knowing inherently more. |
05.07.12 to be perfect is to die trying. to be happy is to acknowledge improvement. to impress is to learn. |
11.30.11 when i drink my tea in the morning, my brain turns over from its side, and having been bent out of shape through the course of a night's twisted subconscious scalings, I turn my eyes to the light in the sky, just above the tops of the trees, and become happy, hopeful, blissful. When i look out my window I might see the world covered in fog, like the photo of a snowstorm, static, white, planar; or I might open my window to the bold sun and blue sky, let the crisp air in, but either way I am happy to be here in a world that is trying. |
12.28.11 why does now not have as high a standard as later? |
12.22.11 i mean, what good is a really advanced understanding of complex math? isn't it as esoteric and non-grounded as say, morse code? who can you speak it with? other mathematicians. what understanding about the world does it give you? |
12.22.11 just realized i dont use the internet to a tenth of its potential. if i make videos i want people to see, i'm doing my message a disservice by seeding it only to youtube. |
12.20.11 1. he doesnt habitually smoke. his responses: 1. i dont remember He means with WRATH BABY |
07.01.12
what i want to know, and what i think is the ultimate question in this case and possibly others, is: government should empower individuals. because a sense of empowerment may naturally imbue one with an equal sense of responsibiliity. would free health care make people feel like they could neglect themselves because they'd always be taken care of? I'll just have these 200 mcdonald's hamburgers, because if i get a clogged artery or heart attack, they'll take care of me. or does it empower one in the opposite direction, and make them happy to have a bestowed honor. like... your body is precious, the govt could say, and we, not even a real body, should hold the human figure as our god. many of man's deities (demigods?) are government and other institutions, but it's ironic. it should be the other way around. |
05.01.12 my farts this morning smell like low tide, and i kinda like it. |
04.04.12 dont want to find myself anywhere anymore. want to know exactly where i'm going. |
03.27.12 what's worse than wondering what could have been? knowing what should have been. |
03.15.12 having one of those 'rearranging the deck chairs...' days. |
03.12.12 my guilty pleasure: downloading your full discography in 4 minutes from pirate bay. [pre-spotify] |
03.01.12 these days 5 years isn't much. but i guess signficant things can happen. |
02.23.12 why listen to music when i could instead let the sounds of my own existence absorb me |
01.09.12 Yes, i'm playing chess with you. |
01.04.12 too much revelry, always paid for |
07.08.11 |
everything on weed is different. on weed: i can totally get at least one more good loaf outta that. that'll be tonight's.
sober: smoking on weed: the will power not to, good judgement, renaissance, enlightenment, wisdom, wisdom of courage. sober: not writing on weed: forming thoughts, articulating with facilitation, writing and execution. |
01.15.10
thinking in the sun is different. i want to know more about the air. I want to know all that i cant see, hear, taste, touch. is love like carbon monoxide? c0 is a material. but they say that atoms are hardly material either. are we, then, just suspension of intentions? everything in suspension. |
11.26.11 spring summer fall winter. spring push/climb inertia cliff the bottom. climb grow be strong get old die. grow are you but one year of your life? |
10.22.11 (from 'turn that frown upside down') |
11.30.11 It helps to have crazy people in your life. Keep them at the edge. they're so crazy you can push them off the edge and they'll come back. Just keep them at the edge. Every once in a while when they try to run inland and approach, you get a glimpse of how sane you are, and perhaps even more importantly, how crazy you've been. You push them once again off the cliff and refocus. |
05.07.12 first we look through it. then we look at it. |
01.10.12 well, nothing too interesting to tell, except that i blew through 60 dollars way too easily. I have a headache and my eyes feel like they want to fall out of my face. the girl was cute and i talked her friend's ear off. at the end of the night i think my date was jealous, she said "why dont you go home with her instead". i found that funny. her friend took off, we bought more alcohol and went back to her place. managed to pour a glass of wine and pop a beer, turn on a movie, take a sip, and then passed out. in the morning we chatted and lounged around. [first date with Gita] |
10.29.11 bend your spoon. |
12.04.11 |
12.01.11 uh, yea. that "uh" really means "you mean it's not already illegal?" exotic is another word for wild. just because they wont kill you doesnt mean they want to hang out in your living room. but first what are exotic animals? which are classified as such? what are "exotic animals"? |
11.11.11 |
11.11.11 in the future, there will be some form of White House Reality TV. It will have been overdue. 1.) provides transparency 2.) provides character depth to incumbents 3.) narratively packages more than just political headlines and soundbytes in politics, which as a result are often seen 'all talk' or 'surface' and leave people confused, perplexed, and uninformed to make good voting decisions. |
11.11.11 |
10.27.11 Actually, nothing seems as important right now as the Occupy Movement. If this doesnt make our shit society better, nothing will. |
10.19.11 Is what is inevitable good to invite in sooner than later? |
10.18.11 If you open it, they will occupy. open your mind, new thoughts will occupy. |
10.14.11 |
071012 I'm not a meteorologist and I don't want to go to school for it, but I wonder what the avg person can gather from monitoring weather systems. to know the matrix enough to predict with accuracy. to understand on a deeper level the effects of forces. |
06.23.12 do not forsake your loyalties, but do put right in its place. |
06.23.12 you know they talk about the "munchies" when you're high ... NOTHING compares to the drunk munchies. my... god.... it's like somebody pressed the eat button and forgot to turn it off. |
06.23.12 I hope at least i am food for your thought. to all of humanity: I hope i am food for your thought. |
06.23.12 - part of running monologue: there it is, you've defined it, now jump over it. |
06.23.12 Stephen Schneider: I know he's not here. I actually never met him. but i know that the pixels i see are not representing something that's alive. I know his body is gone, which means his mind is gone. his ideas are still here though, and that's why i made the video. they were still relevant, and when i heard news of his death, and saw this video, I felt an injustice, or potential injustice, because i thought this person's ideas might get lost if he could no longer express them; so enthusiastically he did... |
06.23.12 Verdicchio becomes steadily more delicious. Oh but who am i kidding? They all do. |
06.21.12
Two movies i recently watched were Chronicle and Cyrus. Both have my recommendation. in other thoughts: sustainability with all that we have now is a myth. Sustainability, with as many people as we have on earth today, will require less production, less activity. Also, can we stop producing synthetic materials that have no reasonable timetable for ecosystemic reintegration? The cynics will snicker, "how were you able to watch those movies without synthetic materials?" - to which i would respond: you're totally right. |
06.13.12 zoom out, find the map |
06.12.12 tonight a beautiful specimen of a female will unsheathe her new record from Amoeba and listen to it alone. Her face will unfurl from glazed and stern to variations of furrowed brow happiness. it will be a world no one can know but her. |
06.08.12 why cant we teach etymology alongside phoenics? learning roots alongside the topical information. that way we learn to look for it, or to view it as equally important, or whtaever its inherent comparative value is. |
06.04.12 one of the problems with smoking weed is that multiple potentialities become noticeable. |
05.27.12 I don't like [facebook's] timeline. it's unintuitive and still confuses me. there are not two vertical realities happening, that i know of. layout is important, and this one sucks. |
11.10.11 everything good takes time; |
10.22.11 - I find flying annoying, because i'm compelled every time to consider that it might be my last day alive. |
041910 - i'm so against religion, and yet i believe it is a religion we must have about the earth and environment and subsequently our infrastructure and consumption. it comes after a clear understanding that the pardigm, the bottom of the value tank, the foundation upon which to build this castle of haste, this realm of zeal, is not discriminatory or detrimental to anyone; conversely, it is beneficial and fostering of everyone and everything we know. |
041810 - Matrix was a great movie. but i think it had varying effects on people, depending on what they brought to the viewing experience. |
oftentimes i feel so good, i dont know where to put it, or how to express it, so it bottlenecks and goes somewhere, sits in the back of my throat until dissipating. |
On the bright side, I'll never regret not having spoken my mind. On the dark side, I'll always regret having been mistaken. |
goal of life: stay unjaded for as long as you can. also, actively work on unjading yourself. |
my friend is in mortal heaven. |
A pessimist always gets what he wants. |
pessimism and optimism are both, i think, forms of intention. perspective is intention. observation [of the world] without judgement [of it] would be non-intention. Is there a point to observation without judgement? wouldn't aesthetic be rendered useless? what is aesthetic without appreciation? |
Politics is decisive ambiguity. Science is ambiguous decision. |
imagine that everything you did, every little thing, mattered to the rest of eternity; the echo not fading, but growing. The universe to be its own echo chamber. only if there are walls, i suppose, some mind to keep it in tact, in unity. |
went shopping for clothes and found some. this is a huge event. |
the morning was just beginning to burn. Black and white photography would look good here, because the shadows are deep. So clear was the air, I could see little figures walking on the deck of the ship [like Titanic.] The ship itself was enormous and picturesque. I saw shots: the orange submarine vessel tied to the side. The names: OMEHTRANS, HANJIN, and all the names on each container. The flatness, almost non-life-like planes of the water vs verticality of the container ships. the contrarily sheer volume of water being pushed up and over by the sharp front end of the ship. [note to self: need to get back there on a clear morning. Friday at 6-7:30 am. hopefully a clear day. ] I imagined it was a human and I an ant. It moved slowly from far away, faster from up close. I thought i could outrun it, get to the other side of its crossing before it would have run me over. it's a tricky POV. |
the wind blasting over the golden gate bridge was warm. |
Nor is the map exactly drawn. |
you cant have a fight without people egging you on. I mean, you can, but it would be boring. |
bike tire's flat I'm not poor, it's just --- uggh, shopping. 09.27.11 |
the magnificence. zooming out, 09.09.11 |
The bridge behind the hills looked like a pencil drawing, flat and grey. The fog made it so. 09.09.11 |
what are convictions if not feelings. Do i have a sort of moral ADD? |
This morning my father woke me up at 4:45, 15 minutes before the alarm clock we had set to get to the airport on time. "Stephen," he said, "it's time to get up." "It's not 5 o'clock yet," I grumbled, and lay where i was, expecting full well to have another 15 minute dream. My mother came in again at 4:55 and told me the same. I could have demanded my 5 minutes, but they were both right, it was probably better to go on and get up. besides, alarm clocks are annoying. but then again, so is my father waking me up before it has a chance to go off. all the gushy feelings I had last night were whisked away by this one little offense. I kept in mind, however, that I was leaving, and that i would not see them again for a while. I would not see my brother either for a long while. I hugged them all more tightly than i had when i greeted them. If it were not awkward, i would probably hug them each for a full minute. why is it awkward? that's just the way we are, i guess. mom and dad took me to the airport and saw me to the security check. I told them "be good to each other". I'm not sure how much they took from that, how much it meant to them, coming from me. Not even sure they know that i know what I do, which by the way is not much, but i made a point to look my father in the eyes when i said that. My brother mentioned they may divorce. They never said anything to me about it. Maybe they expected my brother to relay the message. that's the kind of family we are, i guess. maybe all families do it like that, i dont know. When and if they ever tell me directly, it will probably be "we're divorced", not "we're divorcing". |
is nothing for life? |
So wait, will the Singularity make our machines better, or will we become machines? I'm confused.
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the universe is like the teacups carnival ride.
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i feel atomized. I feel bouncing off of.. where do my ideas come from? It's like before they hit, they have to go through the pinball vetter.
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september is emergency preparedness month, according to FEMA and other US Govt agencies.
The best emergency preparedness is to plan on dying; to plan on everything changing immediately, irreversibly, and possibly taking you or someone you love away. Then, when emergencies happen, they are timely and appropriate. |
has anyone tried to teach chimpanzees to throw a baseball? or shoot a bow and arrow? how about cooking? something practical with a beneficial result. not something abstract like language. teach them how to do stuff for themselves, and i think we'll be surprised at how good they are at it.
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at some point you will have to give up your life.
better start practicing now. |
saw the most beautiful girl i've ever seen in the world, in line at the airport. her demeanor - graceful, elegant, quick; her chin, her sleek doe-esque qualities. she might have been brazilian, hispanic, or just a girl from somewhere in the US. I decided ultimately that she was madrileña. and the spanish are bitches, so fuck her.
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Tomorrow (today) i'm going to a place that is currently clocking as the hottest location in the country. 113°F in Fort Smith, Arkansas.
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so, what is marriage. is marriage a formal declaration of commitment and love that two people share mutually --or is it enrollment into a benefits program for potential procreators? Those who married for love, I'm sure you can understand how repealing DOMA is the true DOMA. |
Dear NPR, just because you can put Barack and Michelle's White House Easter Egg Roll into historical context dating back to Rutheford B Hayes doesnt make it worthy of my ears.
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As long as Dave Iverson is on Forum, I will not donate. sorry, i'm an asshole, but he just judged something "misleading" that was not necessarily and in fact likely not - plus it was humorous, and he missed that too. 052711
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In my opinion, Palin's 2008 interview with Katie Couric WAS in fact "gotcha journalism". Couric became belligerent and unprofessional, asking repeatedly and finally with an ultimatumesque "I'm going to ask you one more time" - all in all a cringeworthy interaction, not the narrative gold that was Palin's prior interview with Charlie Gibson.
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I value honesty and a willingness to communicate more than politeness; more, even, than intellect. Perhaps it is the willingness i see as intelligent.
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I like to talk to people who approach communication with a little humility, who understand that the best conversations are not exercises in domination and submission, but rather an open space to express, explore, and arrive to higher mutual sensitivity and understanding, provoking creative thought. bla bla bla
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the optimal way to watch a tennis match would be through the lens of a camera that was center net when the ball bounces off the player's racket. As the ball approaches the net, the camera would go either left or right, oppositely of the camera. When the ball has reached center net, the camera has reached the far edge (of either left or right) and has elevated a few feet.
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i see a mosquito hovering heavily over my bed, zooming slowly in and out of reach. I think to myself, "I should really try not to kill anything today." ------ (this is not a statement about Obama's fly swatting: I would have done the same)
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we are only a collective of intentions. |
tons of sirens.
reminding me constantly that things are not right in the world. |
i wear black on the outside
because black is how i feel on the inside. -the smiths |
the universe is like the teacups carnival ride.
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is the body like a ship of cells? does the body succeed in staying afloat as long as the majority of healthy cells dominates? in order to change management a ship must experience mutiny. mutiny can start with one, but, can be squelched by the HQ, cant it?
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From Behind The Firewall - (is where people are emboldened to ask the President to legalize marijuana. that's why the first question that comes from the audience, if not an in-person audience, is always on the subject of marijuana legalization. we see it as a ridiculous hypocrisy that we're tired of living with, but we're also law biding citizens who are a little embarrassed to admit we've been breaking the law all along.)
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An eye for an eye makes everyone even: this was primarily a reaction to so many facebook friends conjuring up Gandhi's quote ("an eye for an eye makes everyone blind") I do believe it makes us even, but on what level? we have to look at this and ask, are we happy we're in a war on terror? are we glad we killed someone who killed someone, and whom others may avenge? we gotta get out of this cycle. it's a waste of energy.
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I've seen the depravity at Abu Ghraib.
I've seen Nicholas Berg's decapitation. I've seen the hanging of Saddam Hussein. I've seen US troops shoot Iraqi journalists. What can I expect to see this time? |
There are easy answers, but they're hard to hear. |
fear always has a basis. |